Language shapes what we think is possible. Some of the most powerful rules in our lives are not written anywhere. They live in everyday sayings, repeated so often that nobody notices them any more. Here are five we hear all the time in Iraq, and some alternatives.
1. “عيب” (Shameful)
Used to end a conversation rather than explain one. Instead: “Why do you think that is wrong? Let’s talk about it.”
2. “اسكتي، لا يحچون علينا” (Be quiet, or people will talk)
This teaches girls that other people’s gossip matters more than their own safety or truth. Instead: “Your voice matters. I am listening.”
3. “هذا شغل رجال” (That is men’s work)
Engineering, politics, driving, fixing the generator: skills have no gender. Instead: “Do you want to learn how? Let’s find out together.”
4. “تحمّلي، كلنا تحمّلنا” (Endure it, we all did)
Endurance is not the same as wellbeing, and violence is never something to endure. Instead: “You do not have to go through this alone. Let’s look for help.”
5. “البنت مصيرها بيت زوجها” (A girl’s destiny is her husband’s house)
Marriage can be a beautiful choice, but it is not a girl’s only future. Instead: “What do you dream of becoming?”
Which sayings did you grow up with? Write to us; we may feature them, anonymously, in a future article.
